Congrats, you’ve been selected for a most prestigious position! This is your formal invitation — yes, you, the one not in the Carletonian — to join the Carletonian (insert dramatic fanfare and celebration here). No other club members are as celebrated and adored as those in the Carletonian, and now…
Does it feel as though you are emotionally and/or mentally limping rather than valiantly striding into finals week? Have you resigned yourself to taking notes for all your classes in the same single-subject notebook? Do you find yourself calculating the lowest grade needed on the final to pass your class…
Legend has it that before the very first Carl stepped foot upon our hallowed campus grounds, the rivalry between squirrels and geese was already centuries old. Countless generations have contributed blood, sweat and tears — hold on, can geese sweat? Google says no… Countless generations have contributed blood and tears…
This week, the sun has done a stunning job at luring Carleton students outdoors as they blissfully spilled out in hordes upon the benches, adirondacks, any flat-enough rocks and the grassy fields. And oh, what lush, seductive fields! For so long, our beloved namesake, the Bald Spot, has been a…
A two-and-a-half-hour ode to Timothée Chalamet’s jawline, the 2021 Dune remake did nothing to ease the discomfort of the cramped seating in the Weitz Cinema, to say the least. But film reviews aren’t written by those who aim to “say the least.” So sit back and relax as I, your…
You’ve all heard of Party Week (if not, it’s okay; you can come out from under your rock now, I promise most of us don’t bite). Only slightly less well-known is this: in response to low turnout from the introverted population on campus, there were also events tailored to quieter…
“As finals roll around and ninth week tightens its grip around us all, the will to live slowly leaks from the student body like the last exhales of a mouse in a boa constrictor’s grasp. Even my go-to solution, getting coated in fly-away fur as I lavish the SWA dogs…
You there. Yes, you, the notably unattached one, are a dumbass. Thought a survey (which you filled out fueled only by the desire to procrastinate) was gonna solve the former of those two issues? Think again. There’s probably a nice corner of some sort near you. Go sit in it,…
As Fall Term progresses and the pandemic continues to evolve, so does Carleton’s response. Effective October 6, masks have no longer been required in common, indoor spaces as they were at the start of the term. Since this policy change, faculty have been charged with taking the initiative to decide…
From September 9 to 12, the sounds of hoofbeats echoed on the streets of Northfield during the Defeat of Jesse James Days—an annual celebration of the failed Northfield Bank Raid of 1876. The Northfield Raid was an infamous robbery attempt on Northfield’s First National Bank. A crew aptly named the…