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The Carletonian

The Carletonian

The Carletonian

Quiz: Who’s the perfect Screw Date for you?

<ir="ltr" id="docs-internal-guid-8de69274-30a5-441f-aff2-20b739998b44">What’s your ideal campus job?

    a) Dining hall worker

    b) Info Desk worker

    c) RA

    d) President


How much Sayles $$$ do you still have left?

    a) Approximately $0.65

    b) Below $50

    c) Somewhere around $100 because I’m good at budgeting and have self-control and my life is together

    d) Over $200, I’m a Sayles $ Gatsby


Which campus animal do you identify with?

    a) Asian lady beetle because I’m a poser and people try to get rid of me everywhere I go

    b) Lyman because everyone loves me

    c) Squirrel because I love DEEZ NUTS

    d) The arb goat


What do you consider to be your best trait?

    a) My eyebrows

    b) My shins

    c) My GPA

    d) I’ve never set off a fire alarm while making popcorn


What’s your favorite campus motto?

    a) “Dominos closes at 2am on weekdays and 3am on weekends”

    b) “Submit to the CLAP”

    c) “Carls help Carls”

    d) “Spring term no rules”


What’s your favorite Carleton pastime?

    a) Mooching Sayles food from people

    b) Taking long walks along the lake

    c) Going to office hours

    d) Getting paid on Friday


Your perfect Screw Date is…

Mostly As: Your favorite Sayles order.

You don’t need any date when food is already your lover.

Mostly Bs: Julia Miller ’18.

Strong personality and very knowledgeable in history. A wholesome good kid.

Mostly Cs: Yourself.

Your life is very together and I am very afraid. Spread your wings and fly away, no one is good enough for you.

Mostly Ds: Me.

We’re very similar people and you also have a lot of Sayles money. Hit me up through Carleton email 😉

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