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The Carletonian

The Carletonian

Departments adapt to online learning

Carleton is turning into University of Phoenix (except without the whole subsidy abuse scheme), and for some classes that won’t be too bad. For others, though it’s gonna be a bit of a challenge to move the classroom from Northfield, Minn. to the cyberspace. Here are how some departments are adapting.

  • POSC classes will greatly improve as profs will now have the ability mute white men.
  • CAMS profs are learning how to use the video features of their smartphones.
  • DANC is consulting Synchrony directors on how to teach dances over Youtube Live.
  • CS profs are trying to see if they can legally mine bitcoin using their students’ laptops.
  • AMST being online has somehow made it slightly less of a thing.
  • SOAN is no different than AMST, nor was it ever.
  • ARTS is providing free onlyfans subscriptions so students can look at live nude models.
  • ECON is still having a meltdown over the stock market.
  • PHYS profs are asking students to film themselves struggling for their sadistic desires.
  • BIOL is now offering refresher courses on immunology.
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