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Glue: Trivia n’ Jokes

Trivia:

  1. What was the first bottle of glue? 😂 [LAUGHING_EMOJI]
  2. Who invented glue? 😏 [SUGGESTIVE_EMOJI]
  3. What was the first glue company? 😺 [SUGGESTIVE_DOG_EMOJI]
  4. After whom is glue named? 😜 [BOO_HAHA_EMOJI]
  5. Why choose glue over, say, tape? 🤓 [NERD_EMOJI]
  6. Why must you never utter a Bad Thing about glue out loud on the Carleton premises? 🤩[I_LOVE_YOU_EMOJI]

Answers:

  1. What? Who the hell even are you?
  2. Why are you asking me these questions?
  3. Can I call someone? Please?
  4. Hey
  5. 💀[DEAD_EMOJI] 😡[ANGER_EMOJI] 🤨[ZIZEK_EMOJI] 🔥[DAVIDFOSTERWALLACE_EMOJI]
  6. Let me answer your question with a question. How’s it glooing?
Editor-in-chief Sam expresses his support for Elmer’s glue during a staff Zoom meeting.

Jokes:

My third cousin Jacob kept telling me to fix my rifle using tape, but I myself am a glue fan and will be sticking to my guns. GLUE JOKE!

My dog asked me if I was eating glue, but my lips were sealed. GLUE JOKE!

My favorite TV personality squirted glue in my eye and had to take me to the ER. It was an eye-opening experience. GLUE JOKE!

Ummm, professor, mind talking about something OTHER than GLUE? 🙄 GLUE JOKE!

My nagging [person_close_to_me] guilted me into ending my glue-sniffing ways. I should have stuck with it. GLUE JOKE!

To avoid the bane of my existence I accidentally married, I’ve been reading a book about glue. I can’t put it down. GLUE JOKE!

My friend Michael from Glencoe, Illinois, once tried to glue his skateboard wheel back on after it fell off. Ridiculous, right? I mean, you’d probably need so much more to get it back on. I mean, that’s like a category error or something. Completely crazy. This dude must’ve been unhinged. And so I told him, I told the guy, “Michael, man, what are you doing? Gluing this, it’s not gonna do anything… are you OK?” And he, Michael I mean, he looked up at the barren landscape of east Northbrook (Techny Towers area) sprawl, and he spat on the ground in front of me, scowled a bit, looked a little forlorn, sad even, and he looked me in the eye and said, “Be true to Glue and you’ll always be Glue :).” GLUE JOKE!

Making out with Gorilla Glue is fun, but after a while it gets clingy. GLUE JOKE!

What’s the deal with Airplane Glued? GLUE JOKE!

I hate glue. GLUE JOKE!

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